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Birds in the sky, you know how I feel...

Suddenly it seems as though I have gotten to used to the idea of growing up, or being grown up, and doing all these grown up things which is fine and dandy but there used to be days when I thought it romantic to crawl in a corner and hide and eat noodles with ketchup and no one thought anything of it. And when I needed to communicate I wrote it down and sent it in the post and the fact that I wouldn't get a response for a week, a month, maybe never-didn't bother me. It was the getting rid of the words and thoughts that were important, and when that didn't work I just drank and drank and placed the empty bottle in the middle of the circle and spun it. We all lived on top of one another and just need an excuse to kiss. We all kissed each other all the time. It wasn't a problem.
There were days when cooking dinner was gay, and days when it wasn't. And I contradicted everything I said and didn't care, because there was so much beauty and romance in fucking up and not knowing anything, but thinking I, or we, knew everything.
There was a time when you didn't have to be smart or funny to be cool, you just had to be weird and fucked up and willing to do anything at a moments notice. Drive to anywhere, fuck anyone, swallow everything and deal with it. Then I moved here and smartened up and now look where I am?

McNuggets where my balls should be!

9:57 p.m. - 2006-04-06

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