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something new

i'm fucked up today. only because i trust myself so much its scary. its scary to know somethings true when you dont want to know it.

i cant even write about what i really want to write about, because work sucks so hard today. this job sucks today. i hate that i think that, because its not even that bad.

all i really want to do is smoke, walk, think. think about whats going on with the knots in my stomach and the obsession that is at its breaking point, ready to be set free and rub rampant.

fuck. i dont want to use the word "heart" at all right now. no metaphors about my fucking heart today, please.

5:24 p.m. - 1970-01-04

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history - mystery