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more relapse dreams

so this is another relapse dream:

R had dope, it was really brown and soft-looking. beautiful dope. he was selling it too. i guess i thought fuck it and decided to get high. immediatly afterwards i regreted it. i dont remeber gettting really high in the dream. i remember being pissed about my day count, how i had fucked it up and was going to lie about it at the meeting because there was NO WAY i was going back to the rooms saying that i had one day back. i remember wanting to lie because i really wanted to qualify at 90 days.

another scene. chris was over. we were at my parents in LI. we had been sleeping, but got up to look out the window. there were at first, 1 or 2 stars, and then suddenly there were like a billon, shooting stars all over the place. chris said: let's get chairs and go sit outside on the lawn and watch the stars.

it sounded like a good idea. then he said: where can we get dope? immediatly i was on top of it, so i called R and A, they were dealing. R wasn't home and A was sleeping, but by the time i had finally gotten in touch with A, the sun was up. it was the next day and all the stars were gone. we had missed everything.

this dream sounds very typical for a drug addict i suppose, but it actually means a lot to me.

4:51 p.m. - 2002-04-13

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