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high school is a disease

i smoke too much. a friend is here from the program and it's really not that bad. i used to do dope as a way to deal with people because i thought everyone was so fucking boring. i really felt like i always had entertain everyone. but now, if people need to be fully entertained whilst in my presence, then that's their fucking problem. right? however, i hate it when people talk to me when i'm writing (or reading). i went to 2 meetings today. good way to stay clean cuz i kinda want to use today. it was good to talk to T soberly. i really like him and i want to become better friends with him, but are my motives for that pure? i mean, he's pretty famous and glamourous but i dont think that's why i like him. however, it is easy to get distracted with glamour. my whole bedroom is still so high school, and i really have to get over it already. high school is like a disease. but then the fever breaks, you get over it.

more lates.

6:45 p.m. - 2002-03-25

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