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sweatsuit

so many sleeping problems. keep having dreams about you know who. i almost can't wait to make an ammends, only because it will be some sort of contact. but also because in a deranged way i think i expect a response, which is fucked up and weird. i have to let go of this someday, but i feel as though i am holding on to it so tightly for some reason, and to let go of it too soon would be colossal.

i'm getting more pissed and sentimental about the diary i left on the plane. 2 years! i may as well not have fuckin existed now. am i supposed to beleive that these things happen for a reason?? show me the reason. please please show me show me.

i want to move outr of this small sticky place. i want a house. i want a border collie. i want to be grown up already and have more important things on my mind. i want to be over everything and look back and see my life like a map. i will wear a sweatsuit.

8:53 a.m. - 2004-06-27

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history - mystery