-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And That's One to Grow On

I realized recently that I have a bad habit of making myself seem insecure around other women. Last night I was bombarded with compliments but they weren't the genuine kind, the tone was more of a "don't be so hard on yourself!" vibe. Yes yes I also realize that in writing this it seems like a contradiction, like maybe I can't take a compliment because I am actually insecure. I'm aware of both the former and the latter and trust me it's the former.

It's almost as if I feel guilty when I feel good or pretty or happy. It's not around men, just women.

Maybe it's because deep down inside I know we're all just viscious cats dying to tear one another to shreds.

Pretty fucking sad ladies.

Another observation is that aside from my current relationship, I have only gone out with junkies or alcoholics. This is me, breaking the pattern.

Aren't you siked?

9:34 p.m. - 2006-12-18

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

history - mystery